Heartbeats

My graph changes

My breath gets caught
Words clutter aimlessly
My head confused with the thought

And my heart asks,
How do I say goodbye to someone I never really had?

A path lost, so vague
Never asking for directions
A momentary lapse
Shakes my controlled emotions

And my heart asks,
Why do my tears fall so endlessly for someone who was never really mine?

An astounding loss broke through
My conscience spun around
Deep inside me stirred something
Reminding me of the time that wound

And my heart asks,
Why is it I miss someone I was never really with?

Gripping the edges
I let my heart beat a while
Soliciting a response true
Yet so amazingly distant

And my heart asks,
And why do I love someone whose love was never really mine?

Will I ever get answers to this?
Will I be left fending for myself?
No compass shows me the direction
No hand guides me
I will find them right n soon
'Cause I haven't come here to stay.