Forever and Ever and Ever

I stood alone, I stood veiled
I stared ahead without a shield

Wetness smeared my colour fast
My known identity completely unmasked

My sight hazed into a dreary scene
I lost control of my physical being

A shine caught my blurred eye
I peered, I strained, let go a sigh

Warmth flooded my veins high
A familiar persona cornered me by

The smile, the eyes, the face said it all
It was now here at my beck and call

A whiff of air jerked me quick
From the corner of my eye I saw it flick

The impression, the fragrance filled the air
The known had stepped in for its share

Relief and joy surged so fast
I wanted this beautiful feeling to last

It was here, here with me
I wanted to shout with happiness and glee

It was my support, it was my life
I hung on to it like a dying child

It soothed me, consoled me and hushed me to sleep
Unconsciously my heart conducted a gigantic leap

It is a presence and a lulling entity
It sustains and encourages my raw sanity

I love you for being there when I need you
I love you for being my moral support

I know I am lucky to have you with me
I know I am blessed with you eternally

And now for the truth so pure and bare
I found my lucky clover fresh and rare

I am a nobody, a nothing without them
And I want them to be here with me for my every game

It Happened To Me or Did it?

I was feverishly clicking my keyboard away

When you entered abruptly

My life went haywire

Because the intrusion was damn too quickly

Nights passed and days became longer

With each passing moment you came a little closer

Words knew no bounds

That I wished this last forever

Again and again my heart went out to you

Small memories forming a whole world new

I thought and fumbled over the phone

But all I wanted was to hear you

Days became months and months became years

The way it shaped had happiness and tears

I loved it, I cherished it, and I nurtured it with care

But all you could give me was no time to spare

I loved you and my habits deadened

For you it was like nothing had happened

I swallowed the bile of words that arose

I pushed back my anger with irrevocable force

But then it was all over and suddenly gone

Time is no healer when you are all alone

Wait and watch or so was I told

What do I do till then, put my life on hold?

Now I am here writing these words

Wondering what went wrong and if it could be worse

Hope for all you can says my heart

For what I have done has no remorse

I question and question yet question again

Silence imposes its way through the pain

My hollowness speaks back to me

Curtailing your presence the empty walls glare at me

As I hear the rains come down on the roof

My fingers trace out this familiar truce

A pact that I have made with myself a thousand times over

But to follow it through I still might need the lucky clover

Will I win or will I not

Can be seen only after a drought

A drought that storms and rules my life

Without you I am nothing but nobody alive

Revelation from Hell

What it was and what it became

With one night everything changed
Guilt eroded slowly my heart
Fright embedded in my chest
How could I do that to you I asked
I must be cruel and without a heart
Pain struggled at my soul and let it rip
Yet I couldn’t see you so I let it slip
Yes it was true what I did
And I told you everything
None expected left you though
Stabbed me a thousand times over
What did I do to get this?
No answer whatsoever comes to me
Hiding it beneath your perfect stature
You led me to lands unknown
Your hand was all I held there
And you didn’t think twice before absconding it
With the cruel and heartless hidden possessions
You made me feel as if I was shit
Thought I was the bad one here
But you surpassed with your talent
Why should I do this?
And why should I trust you?
While all you do is hurt me
I could very well ignore you
But I can’t be like you
I tried and still do
But you have left no reason for me to trust you.

A Lonely Delusion

I walk by and I notice

That you’ve been there

Brushing me twice

So I’m assured you’re for real

I walk ahead putting aside your thoughts

And I stand still glancing over the sidewalk

A shudder strikes and my consciousness returns

Yes you are here my inner self affirms

As powerful as the sensation can be

A voice in my head provokes me not to believe

Arriving back to the present seems an ordeal

As I strive for attention my head reels

Softly you touch my cheek

A gasp leaves me or so I think

I spin around to finally face you

Alas there is nothing but solitude anew

The Outlandish Experience

You cloud my thoughts,
You brainwash me.
You drown me,
I still need you baby.

You are an addiction,
You are unavoidable.
You are like a drug,
You make me vulnerable.

You attack me,
You leave me defenseless.
I might be alone here,
But you complete my self.

Crazy as it might seem,
You are my angel.
I love you and you love me back,
Yet we are strangers.

Words of Compassion

Extending my hand towards the calm and serene,

I found you smiling peacefully.

Touching my presence you felt my heart,

It dissolved all my agony.

No worry can break me,

Nor can any lady.

I’ve got you and that’s all I care because,

You are my answer to destiny.

Way of Life

A thunder passes by,
My senses trek back to the attendance.
So lost was I,
Attention grappled to focus on existence.

Humming a song of which lyrics I do not know,
Yet unearthing those phrases was a simple flow.

Was it you? Was it the Providence?
My spirit led the path that trailed your presence.

Distinctly I heard a voice entitling your self,
It became my guide and showed me the way.

A light there was, as bright as a spark of diamond glitter,
My heart quivered with hope but yet it could shatter.

With rickety ground beneath my feet,
Trust was no longer an ally of me.

Hands lengthened out I frantically sought thee,
Groping the faint darkness my eyes spot the silhouette of he.

Blood rushed, heart hammered,
My visionary devices probed underneath a cover.
A long gasp and a wild cry,
I could hear my hope exploding by.
With all ropes and hooks efforts went futile,
It went just like that under the crevice.

A thunder passes by,
My senses trek back to the attendance.
So lost was I,
Attention grappled to focus on existence.

Just to focus on existence.

Lost in Perplexity

As I peered into the screen,
My vision blurred, it hazed out.
Before I realised what entered my mind,
The wetness began to dawn.

Blink was all I did,
With nothing to plaster it up.
A flash with the most painful memories,
Ripped apart a fraction of my soul.

Conjuring up the weirdest notions,
My psyche began to participate.
In what was my scariest credence,
Applying all benefit.

I happened to shrug,
As my receptors perceived a jingle.
Peeking to trace the foundation,
Uncomplicated confusion arose.

Why and when did this happen,
Where would it be.
Brandishing my hands in the darkness,
I try to find me, just me.

Sensation of a Presence

The rhythmic beats, the powerful silence.
Lost in your self, an enigmatic presence.
Twist of thoughts, weird intuitions.
Some remain those unanswered questions.
Life or death doesn’t matter anymore.
With you I rest, peace engulfs my soul.
Eyes behold the truth I want you to know.
Words fall short of the feeling called love.

Mixed Emotions

Trying to stare into your eyes,
The look that glances my way,
With a sense of belonging my heart sighs,
And it begins to say.

A single question and a single answer,
Led to a change in our lives,
Moving ahead with a different feeling,
Days are passing by like a ride on your bike.

Your cricket injuries make my heart skip a beat,
The cold you get has me in worries,
You ride your bike like a snake gliding through,
Please think just once that there’s someone who cares for you.

A kiss here and a touch there,
Sends ripples beneath my skin,
The movie theater and the dark,
Don’t you feel there was a spark?

You pull my leg and you tease me,
I like it but there’s a time for that too,
Grow your hair long enough,
And I swear I’ll disown you.

I’m sorry because I’ve hurt you,
But don’t worry I’m trying to get through,
The mixed emotions that rush in my heart,
Will disappear once I get the groove.

Please don’t misunderstand me,
Because there’s a lot you don’t know,
Yet when I look at you I feel,
That you know me through and through.

Being optimistic has helped a lot of people,
And I hope it helps us too,
But deep down in my heart there’s a beat,
That says, “I love you.”

Guilt

One mistake - though I hope it doesn’t cost much,

As stupid as I was, it wasn’t a lie.

Can’t it be forgotten just this one time?

With repentance in front of me, I abide.

Don’t know why I’m writing this,

Don’t know why I’m feeling sorry.

But my heart bleeds its own,

With remorse I did try.

Can just pray and can just hope,

That it gets alright.

But the uneasiness caused inside,

Flutters by like a bird dying.

I want it to be okay,

And I want it to be perfect.

The words that I faced,

Jabbed me in the gut like a stye.

Please forgive me for what I did,

I’m just a nobody.

All I want is peace,

But till now I’m not getting any.

This is my fault,

But I’m not the one suffering enough.

All I want is to forget,

And rush by as if nothing happened.

I promise myself,

That I will not let myself down.

All I need is a hand that,

Rests above me and guides me through and out.